So you have met this terrific person that is into the same exact activities that you are into.  Most people would call this type of dating special interest dating because these activities may not be common like horse back riding, martial arts or even musicians.  It is one thing to have an open minded partner who is interested in learning what you know and another is a person who already participates in what you do.  In this way, you are able to collaborate together rather than have the teacher student dynamic in the relationship.

There are two very different sides to special interest dating.  Finding someone who enjoys what you love to do is a great way to meet this person first of all and then to spend time with them.  Life is so busy sometimes that between working and studying, the few hours that you have off, you want to spend them doing something that you love.  However, if you have a partner, you will be expected to spend time with this person.  With special interest dating, you can spend time with the person that you have or want to have a relationship with and do what you love to do.

You can learn a lot about your special interest from your partner’s point of view.  This could be valuable and interesting information that makes you fall deeper in love.  At this point, special interest dating seems to be the best type of dating out there.  Here comes the but.  A major downside of special interest dating is that if one day you do not want to pursue your special interest or can no longer do it, then you may lose the one bond that was holding your relationship together.  You may even become resentful if your partner can continue to participate while you cannot.

You may also lose your identity in special interest dating,  Many people pride themselves in having a talent.  When you share that talent with the person you love, you may feel like you are less special.  Therefore, if you want to feel good in your relationship and have a strong relationship despite having a common interest then it is important to have interests outside of your special interest.  If you are a martial artist, it may be better to train in different dojos.  If you are a musician, you may want to play in a different band then your partner.  This way you can keep your identities and separate your lives a little while still having a common interest to link each other together.

This post was written by Allison Schleck of Senior Dating

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Interracial dating is becoming increasingly popular and common.  However, for our parent’s generation this mixing of ethnicity and culture is not always looked so highly upon.  Whereas interracial couples are bridging a gap between cultures and races, the families of these couples may be more hesitant.  The main reason why they are so hesitant is because they are afraid.  Being in an interracial couple may not be the norm for your family so they have never experienced what it is like to be with someone from another race.  With this being said, fear comes from what is unknown.

Being in an interracial relationship can be the most amazing experience of your lifetime because you are introduced to a completely new world and you are able to invite someone into your world.  You should not be discouraged from pursuing an interracial relationship because no matter how great this person is someone is always going to have a negative view or an opinion about it.  Therefore, you need to love by how you feel.  If you feel strongly for this person, then what the rest think, doesn’t really matter and this includes your family’s opinions.

When you bring someone from a different ethnicity home to meet the family, it may be wise to give your family notice.  You want to avoid any awkward misconceptions that they may have about this person before the big meeting.  If you are dating someone from different country, religion or ethnicity you should forewarn your family so that their eyes do not grow wide upon the first encounter.  If your family doesn’t have a problem then you are pretty much set for a nice evening with your significant other and your family.  If there is some sort of animosity then you may have to sit down and have a good chat with the folks.

Many relatives may even ask you about your intentions with this person and it is good to clarify them.  If you look at your partner and you see a person that you get along with really well, someone who you can learn a lot from and that you enjoy this person’s company then you are dating for the right reason.  If you are dating this person because you know that it will create some crazy family drama or prove a point, then you should not be in this particular relationship.  Make sure you are dating this person because you want to and not because you want to date their ethnicity.

You are the ultimate mediator in this situation.  If there is any tension between the family and your partner it is your job to clear the path.  If you have to lay down some rules or write down talking points then go for it.  Unfortunately, being in an interracial relationship can cause a commotion but as long as you are able to handle the situation and what comes with it, then you and your partner can focus on what is really important; creating a lasting and loving relationship.

This post was written by Allison Schleck of Senior Dating

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